Empty Nest
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The Real Awkward Age
We, empty nesters, are at that awkward age. We wander around looking for a jacket to hang up, a notebook to place on the shelf, a pile of folded laundry to set on an unmade bed. Lost souls searching for someone to shop with or come along on a dog walk, we cook too much food and are surprised when the kitchen looks just the way we left it. We worry. What is my child eating and who with? Do they have enough? Money? Food? Furniture? Spices? Are they getting enough sleep? Exercise? Vitamins? We lack concentration and feel our importance diminished. We are bereft of purpose. Buddy has just moved…
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My Son Moved Out Last Summer
My son, Buddy, moved out August 1st. I am halfway to being an empty nester, in the official sense. This is the real thing. He’s not going away to university for a year and coming back. I am not making the temporary move to Fort McMurray and finding him at home when I return. The minute he moved, in fact he wasn’t yet finished, his sister, Princess, moved down to his room. It is further away from our’s and allows for more privacy. When Buddy was away at school I went into his room just to look and feel close to him by standing amongst his things. Now there is…
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I Didn’t Want a Dog!
My husband, The Consultant, and I were only in Fort McMurray about two weeks when the text message from Princess came to my cell phone – “Let’s Skype. We have something to show you.” As I read the message out loud, The Consultant and I nodded at each other. We knew what this meant as our memories flashed back fourteen years to a summer morning at the lake. It was my daughter, Princess’s seventh birthday and The Consultant and I were not yet out of bed when she called us. “Mom. Dad. Come outside. We have something to show you.” I knew she and her brother had a dog out…
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Opposites Still Attract
And they said it would never last. My husband and I just celebrated our 26th wedding anniversary. Whoever said, “opposites attract” wasn’t kidding. My husband, The Consultant and I are the north and south poles. He is hot mustard, I am ketchup, he is Led Zeppelin, I am Bette Midler, he is a Jeep, I am a Honda. He sees the world in black and white and I see every colour of the rainbow. I am creative expression while he is depth and contrast. We are the Canadian Gene Simmons and Shannon Tweed. Upon meeting The Consultant, our acquaintances are surprised by our opposing personalities. “What is a nice girl…
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The Empty Nest North
I am becoming a woman I can’t see. I am an empty nester and in, what experts would call, transition. You know, that period where one changes from one state or condition to another. I know, I am transitioning from dedicated, hands-on mother to… someone I am yet to know. My son and daughter are young adults who are embarking on their own lives. My husband took a contract eight hours north of Calgary. At this stage, any wise woman would recognize this natural course of life and make plans to leave the kids behind in the house. They need her less. She needs to stay connected with her husband…
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Too Excited to Sleep
‘Tis the season to reflect on the year gone by. In the series of events that shaped my past year, there was one dazzling five-day period that stands out against the rest. I had been dreaming for many years of making the trip to the Denver area for a women’s journal writing retreat hosted by Kay Adams of The Center for Journal Therapy. I earned my certification to teach Journal to the Self, with Kay, through the Center about 8 years ago and always had a wish to work with Kay in person. On June 20, 2011 that dream came true for me. I was picked up at Denver airport…
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52 Is The New 52
Last week I celebrated my 52nd birthday. On my birth date, most years, I can honestly say that I feel four or five years younger than my chronological age. This year was unique due to the series of events I experienced, some fortunate, others unfortunate. This year I am feeling 52 years old. A friend has reminded me that this is a transition year for me. No wonder I am feeling my age. It takes energy to transition! I am experiencing many endings and many new beginnings. In April, I left my job as a financial advisor’s assistant to assist my husband in his own business. This has created a…
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Come Cook With Me, Baby!
In the year 2 or 3 BC (before children), my husband (The Consultant) and I enjoyed some of our weekend evenings in the kitchen together. It was social time where we experimented with new recipes and connected over a glass of wine, often toasting our own scrumptious creations. We ate late, sometimes by candlelight, and solved all the world’s problems while doing so. It was fun. Fast forward 25 years and The Consultant has a new favourite saying while in the kitchen. “Six feet, six feet,” he says, oscillating around the room with arms outstretched. This is a little idea he adopted from a family friend, chef wannabe, and good cook…
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I Need My New Shoes On
Today, I am struggling with the need to put away my flops and surrender myself to shoe and sock season. With this thought comes sadness that summer, my favorite season, and the freedom that comes with going sockless, has come to an end. As the most unattractive purple colour is creeping into the skin tone of my toes, I have to acknowledge that the temperature has dipped to -1C this morning. It isn’t putting the socks on that makes me sad as much as the loss of freedom represented by taking my socks off. While raising my kids, I loved the summers. Especially that first warm day where they yanked…
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Keep the Nest Feathered with Social Media
Last Saturday night, while checking my Facebook page for earth-shattering activity, updates or events that I might have missed in the last twenty-four hours, I connected with my middle-aged cousin, who was in contact with 3 of her other friends while, at the same time, I was in contact with another of mine. She drew my attention to the coincidence and via instant messaging, we wrote comments to each other on what our lives have become. We couldn’t help but notice how many of us were sitting alone at our computers at 10:00 p.m. on a Saturday night, attempting to make contact with the outside world. Then it occurred to…
